1 – Let’s see, let’s see; what happened today…? Many things! Monsters! Gobrins! Black yucky water! Bugga needs to remember these stories so that she can tell the tales to strangers and get money and supper for the warband. Let’s start from the top!
There was a deepdark temple underground. Looooots of walking! And the tunnels went on further! There was a yucky monster with a big funny mouth, and he was trying to bite, but Mister Sniffles and Warleader Pinchy and Buttfart all took care of him. Dizzy Kaboom was grumpy, saying lots of things. Dizzy Kaboom says so many things!
Then a statue had a special stick. Gorn said it was special but Bugga wasn’t so sure… then, more monsters in another room with a bridge, and then a table with straps on it. Gorn said the table was bad… it smelled bad. Three tiny skellingtons in the closets!
Then there was a gobrin with THREE ARMS! He chop-chop-CHOPPED at Warleader Pinchy, and Bugga got scared of something… can’t remember what, now. BUT IT WAS SCARY OKAY. There were also monsters in the holes. Bugga melted one! It was like “bloop, noooo” and Bugga laughed. Heehee, silly monster!
Then there was…. ahh…. yes, a spinny stair going nowhere (Dizzy Kaboom had to make double sure!) and a special floating room where Dizzy Kaboom threw up his breakfast and lunch! Was very funny to watch him spin and try to avoid his throw-up! Bugga tried hard to keep that laugh in, because Dizzy Kaboom always gets back at anyone who makes him the fool… hehehe! IT! WAS! SO! FUNNY!
Then we went baaaaack, back, back to the big scary door, and the black Lamashtu’s face was put in it, and she smiled and opened it for us; thank you Lamashtu! Gorn says to say thank-you when the doors are opened! Inside was another room and Bugga and Dizzy Kaboom tried to figure out the black water. Bugga has many ideas but she tries to put onnnly her best up when Dizzy Kaboom pays attention! He’s important, and is a fire-maker! Bugga’s going to ask some of his secrets if she can make friends with him!
The door was going to open but then Buttfart said to send Bugga in first. Bugga didn’t like this; reminded Bugga of Gok the Stupid Under-Chief and how he didn’t like Bugga’s stories, and always tried to volunteer Bugga for the jobs like “stab the horses, Bugga” or “grab the dog’s tail, Bugga”. Stupid Gok! Gok always smiled that mean stupid smile when he looked at Bugga; he was mean because Bugga didn’t want to make babies with him, but Guglug the Chief always said “stupid Gok, Bugga is a Teller, not a Dog-Biter!”. STUPID GOK! Was only good part of that day; coming up slope from swamp to see Gok running away from village, and then the humie threw the axe and Gok went spinning and shrieking… stupid Gok…
….. Bugga never saw Guglug again, though. Bugga would have wanted to say “bye Guglug! You’re Bugga’s favorite!” before she went with Gorn, and give one of those hugs that humies give… Stupid humies…
… Anyways! Whatever Bugga was saying, the end!
2 – The monsters died, and good riddance, Bugga says! The magic room was weeeeeird, though. Lots of water, and so cold! Whatsit monster made another ugly monster, and then the Whatsit was invisabrul, and something funny happened to Bugga’s magic; it would go all bloobly when she tried some spells, making weird things happen instead of just hurting the monsters.
The one time, Bugga pointed acid at the big monster, but out jumped darkness, and then a kind of crackle of gray from Bugga’s finger at the monster. The monster got still for a second but shrugged; Bugga’s never seen that before when making acids! Then, the Whatsit was flying and hurting Gorn, so Bugga used more acid but then she was in the Whatsit’s head, and it asked “what. is. thy. bidding.” and Bugga laughed. “Fly down; land!” Bugga said, and there goes the Whatsit! So weird!
The Whatsit ran away though; Mister Sniffles nearly got it. Gorn, too. Then Warleader Pinchy said that they’d won and Bugga was surprised! Don’t you only win when everyone’s dead? Oh well.
So, Gorn and Bugga get the night at the inn, and it sounds like lots of things will happen tomorrow. Dizzy Kaboom found a silly book and stopped talking; book probably already ate his words. If he dies Bugga’s going to get that book and steal his words from it, then Bugga will know the fire! Haha!
Until then, Bugga’s going to sleep. A big supper finished for a big hero, and a big breakfast when Bugga wakes up! There’s going to be stories about Bugga, and she needs to be big enough to fit in them! As big as Gorn!